A bookman has no need for a heart
by eunjus2
Summary: Having lost his Innocence, Lavi is now leaving the Order! LavixLeenali


Lavi sighed and took a quick, last glance back at the room where he'd been living for the past years. When he'd first arrived to the Order he and the old man had lived in the library, but soon Komui had given Lavi his own room; he was a teenage boy, after all, Komui had reasoned, and teenagers needed their privacy.

Lavi and the old man had been packing their things last night and soon the room would probably be someone else's, maybe when a new Exorcist arrived at the Order.

But Lavi would never again come back. His Innocence was gone, forever. All he had left now, all he could be, was Bookman. He was Bookman's apprentice.

And Bookman had decided they would move on, leave the order.

He'd told Allen, of course. And Kanda too, Kanda had been speechless when he'd broken the news.

Leenali… she was out on a mission and there was no way he could've told her _that_ by calling her golem. But the thought of never again seeing her… it hurt. It hurt badly.

Lavi picked up his few belongings, stepped out of the room and closed its door for the last time ever. Then he followed Bookman, who was walking a couple of meters in front of him, trying not to think of his friends. Of Leenali.

After all, a Bookman has no need for a heart.

-------

Leenali had arrived at the Order last night with her finder, both exhausted and she'd fallen asleep as soon as she'd lain down on her bed. She'd slept the whole day but now she had suddenly woken up. Something was just so wrong… something felt terribly wrong.

So she'd slipped out of her own room and made her way down the corridor to Lavi's. It was a habit of hers, ever since he'd admitted seeing her crying at the coffins of her friends so many years ago.

He knew why she had nightmares and he didn't shun her. He would just sit together with her in the bed, back against the wall and he would stroke her hair and tell her one of the many stories he'd read.

"Lavi? I'm sorry to wake you up, but…"

The door creaked when it slowly opened. The room was empty. No books piled against the walls, none of Lavi's clothes thrown onto the floor.

The only thing left in the room was the bed.

_No, this can't be happening_, she thought, pressing her hands to her mouth as if trying to prevent herself from screaming out loud. _This…_ this_ is a nightmare… please… Lavi!_

-----

Lavi stopped. Turing his head, as if he tried to listen to a sound he'd heard.

"Why are you stopping Lavi?" Bookman called from in front if him. "Hurry up!"

"Sorry old man", Lavi said, smiling. "Just thought I heard something."_Linali…_

Bookman walked around the corner and soon disappeared out of sight.

Lavi was just about to speed up so that he wouldn't be too far apart from the old man.

Suddenly, he heard it. The sound of feet rapidly hitting the stone floor, and it was drawing closer.

"Lavi!" Leenali shouted as she came running barefooted and still clad in only her pajamas. "Lavi, where do you thing you're going?!"

Lavi's knapsack slipped onto the ground at the sight of her.

"Leenali…?!" he gasped, shocked, as she threw herself in his arms. "But-but I thought you was still out on a mission. When'd you get back here?"

"Oh, Lavi… what do you think you're doing?" she sniffled, and buried her face in his shirt. "You're not even wearing your Exorcist's coat!"

"Well… that's cause I'm not an Exorcist anymore", he said, awkwardly stroking the back of her head.

Leenali sniffled, and looked up at him.

"We're leaving", he said apologizing. "Bookman and I are. Sorry I didn't tell you, but I didn't want to give you the new over a Golem, and while you were out on a mission, too!

I… I didn't want to make you cry, that's all."

"But I'm crying", she sobbed, clenching his shirt. "Lavi, you can't leave us! Please don't go! Don't leave me alone here!"

"You won't be alone", he objected. "I mean, Kanda and Beansprout will still be here, right? Leenali, you'll never be alone again."_I don't wanna leave this girl…_

She looked at him, tears streaming down her pale cheeks. Still standing close, but she let go of him.

"I'll always be alone without you", she whispered, rubbing the back of her hand over her eyes.

"A bookman has no need for a heart", he said, repeating the words Bookman had told him once. She stared at him.

"Lavi…"

"A bookman has no need for a heart", he repeated, cupping a hand around her face. "And since I'll have no need for a heart… I give my heart to you."

"And I'll give you this to remember me…" she whispered, placing a hand behind his neck.

She reached up and kissed him, slowly, carefully caressing his pink lips with her own.

"Leenali…" he gasped when she withdrew from him.

"Please… don't- don't forget me!" she said, squeezing his hand. "Don't forget Allen or Kanda, either. Because we won't forget about you Lavi."

And with that, she turned and fled down the corridor.

Lavi stared after her fleeing figure.

"You always seem to make her cry, stupid _Usagi_", a voice growled and Kands stepped out of the shadows.

"Hey, Yuu…" Lavi said, but without his usual, happy voice. And the sound didn't anger Kanda the way it usually did when he heard his name being said.

Kanda sighed and glared at the red head, who still looked down the corridor where Leenali had gone.

"Seems like she managed to reach you before I did", Kanda said. "I was gonna see you off too."

"How did you know I'd be leaving tonight?" Lavi turned his head and met Kanda's gaze.

"I went to your room first", Kanda said. "You did a good job emptying it."

A sudden sound made them both turn; only to see a white haired youth stand in the middle of the corridor. Allen was barefooted, and dressed in just a pair of trousers. Judging by the food in his hand, he'd woken up and made a raid in the kitchen.

"Lavi", he said, staring at the knapsack laying forgotten on the floor.

"Sorry", Lavi said, scratching the back of his head. "I was just leaving anyway…"

"Yeah, I know", Allen said, blinking when Lavi picked up the knapsack and slung it over his shoulder.

And then Allen frowned.

"Hey, Lavi", he said. "You sure you want to do this?"

"Do what?"

"You know…" Allen's voice trailed off.

"Leave us", Kanda helped. "You don't have to, Lavi."

"Guys, if you've forgotten, let me say this again: I don't have my Innocence anymore. It broke, okay? Thank you for caring, but I can't stay here. I'll only be in you way."

He turned and started to walk after Bookman.

"I'm sure Komui could find you something to do if you really wanted to stay."

Lavi stopped. Bookman was far gone by now, and he sure wasn't about to come back for an apprentice who didn't want to become a Bookman anyway.

But he didn't have his Innocence anymore. He wasn't an Exorcist.

_Aren't you our comrade too? Or am I wrong..? _

"I…"


End file.
